I'd like to think that my life is interesting enough that I can post just about anything on here about my life and have people read it because they are so intrigued. Then I realize I'm just lying to myself. All I do is wake up, go to work, come home, get on the internet, and read. That's what my days have consisted of. I'm trying to work on a few things in my life right now. I'm trying not to get so overly stressed about everything because in the long run it's not really worth it. I would also like to watch what I say to people. I'm normally a pretty open person but I tend to regret saying some of the things I do because then I realize what I said just went against what I did.
I'm convinced that everything is mental. My fears, my moods, my pain, everything. I've told myself that other people aren't afraid of spiders so why am I? I joined this website called 43 Things. It's pretty neat. I make a list of 43 things that I would like to do. Right now I only have 20. But I'm working on it. One of them is getting over my fear of spiders. I don't want to be scared. I don't want to constantly have to look around or shake and cry and freak out when I see one. It's annoying and I hate it. I keep telling myself who cares if they bite me. I have a pretty good immune system that I'm pretty sure I could handle it. And I can guarantee I've already been bite in my sleep or when I wasn't looking. I have a stronger chance of getting in to a car crash than dying from a spider bite. There look scares the daylights out of me. They aren't attractive at all. I don't like how slow tarantulas walk either. I mean seriously, I hate being surprised. I'm not a surprised person. Knock on the door before you come barging in. Spiders sometimes have no manners and feel they can appear wherever or on ANYTHING they want. So, that is the big thing I am working on. I was going to get a tarantula tattoo on my foot so I get used to them. I am getting better so I can't complain to much.
I've realized that I am totally changing as a person. Who I was when I lived in NY is totally different than the way I am now. In many ways. I'd like to think It's for the better. But you know how people get when someone changes than what they're used to. Then they get all upset because you aren't who they want you to be.
I waited on this girl today and her drivers license was from Hawaii. I wanted to ask her why she would pick to move to good ol' Pennsylvania instead of Honolulu, Hawaii. But I didn't. That's like when I tell people I'm from NY and they say "Why would you want to move here"? Then I reassure them I'm from upstate and I get a "Ohhhhhhhhh". It's pretty interesting. Sometimes people forget there is actually a state of New York and not just the city. I'm guessing they might have flunked their geography class in high school.
Well, I think I'm going to take a rest and go read or figure out how to improve my awesome blogger. So I will update some more later.
-Erica the Daydreamer
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